randomizing | [ Opening Mingle ]

[Everyone will wake up suddenly, as if having drifted off -- while sitting upright in an uncomfortable office chair. In one hand they're holding the communicator, and in their lap is propped a clipboard with a job application (standard, looking something like this; it requests up to ten years of job history, ) and a pen. The waiting room is also fairly standard, except for being empty.]

[The communicator's lock screen reads, Complete the job application. Time limit, twenty-four hours.]

[There are magazines, fake plants, and computers. There's a staff lounge with food -- tupperware that might have belonged to some of these nonexistent workers, popcorn and cocoa packets, vending machines -- and restrooms. There are exits, but characters will be unable to use them... or make their own, or escape in any way.]

[So the characters are stuck here, until tomorrow morning. Set up a comment telling everyone what your character is doing, and thinking, whether they're obeying the task or not, at any time during the day. Then tag other people! Be sure to check back later in the week, when people are encouraged make threads for the evening as well as the day! Characters that have been claimed are also welcome at this point to join the community, and will be able to make their own posts, which can be tagged by anyone taking part in the event.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ yeeeeah, definitely giving you the side eye. giant puppy dog eyes don't really have the desired effect on him, though. ]

Great to meet you. So, if I hire you, is someone gonna come by and break my kneecaps?

[he'll keep that in mind for when he's doing it on purpose] No, no. I'm an expert at escaping trouble.

[ eyebrow quirk, slight amusement ]

In other words, when they show up, you'll be long gone? [ maybe having transferred your debt to the magical(?) mob to him? this sounds like a sweet deal all around ]

It's always worked so far!

[although his smug only lasts a few beats before his gaze refocuses, elsewhere, smile evening out. maybe it hasn't always worked so far]

[ smug smirky kid has become... slightly sad kid. this is so not an improvement.

yeah, he's faked too many smiles not to recognize it. but he glances away and says ]

Just as long as I don't wake up with any horse heads in my bed.

[somewhat scandalized, looking back at Tony] --Why would someone do that to a horse?

Movie parody?

Not helpful. [in case you wanted to know, and/or have validation that you are as unhelpful as you are trying to be] Are you ever going to tell me what this Stark Industries of yours actually does?

[ he just grins ] I'm trying.

Let's start with "electricity". On a scale of 1 to 10, how often do you use it, in a given day? [ -1 is "what's electricity?" ]

All the time! There are electric light fixtures, and telegraphs and telephones... [that's pretty much it though, he runs out of things there]

[ yeeeeeeah. that's, like, a 4. at best. ]

Well, I make things that run on electricity. [ amusing himself ] And, occasionally, nuclear fusion. [ let's see how blank a face can get ]

[Allen knows when he's being trolled] Wonderful. Do they do anything, or do they just pointlessly consume electric power? Because I can't imagine how you plan to make money off that.

I could check with the kitchen. [ comfortable in the face of your irritation! ] But no, really, you've got... pretty much that whole thing backwards. Which is cool, totally fine. Low expectations, and it's not like I'm making things easier.

Say, you didn't happen to crash in a plane flying over the arctic and then wake up with a team of doctors who seemed shocked by every other word out of your mouth, did you? Just checking.

[now what is that supposed to mean] [you know what, never mind. you don't get to know that he doesn't know what a plane is! he will put on his sweetest face for you] Are you on another topic already? I'm so sorry, I must seem frightfully slow to you, but that lightning bolt of knowledge that you're waiting for to enlighten me doesn't seem to have struck yet.

What... did you say your company's machines do?

[ his nose wrinkles with involuntary amusement ]

I didn't, really. We do just about everything.

Except weapons development. We used to, but then the Whos started singing and my heart grew three sizes. It was a whole thing.

[...] I feel like I only understand about fifty percent of any given thing you say. I was with you until "Hoos" started singing?

[weapons manufacturing. guns and the like. that's wonderful, he understands that. not his favorite industry in the world though]

They live down in Whoville. Big fans of Christmas. [ yeah, he's just not helpful ] My point was really more about the Grinch, anyway.

Are you just making up words? Grinches and Whos and nuclears... This is the worst job offer I've ever gotten, and I spent years as a professional blame-taker.

Hey, don't look at me. Blame Dr. Seuss. And Einstein, depending on which words we're talking about.

But I could use a few blame-takers. We usually call them the PR department, for... PR reasons. Plus, they don't just take blame. How are you at deflecting it?

[ he actually likes you, Allen! just a little. ]

[he doesn't dislike you, as annoying as you obviously are being. and you know you could use a professional blame-taker] That depends on your definition of "deflect". [ha-ha! he deflected your question about his ability to deflect]

[ lips turn up a little more ] Ideally onto our enemies. [ mwahahaha ] But most of them don't actually need the help. [ seriously Hammer Industries pretty much just sets itself on fire if you ignore it for like two minutes ]

Oh, that's good news. Incompetent enemies are my favorite kind.

Sometimes I catch myself thinking, I could use more of a challenge in life.

But then the universe tends to drop aliens and gods and a whole lot of other impossible nonsense on your head. So I'm gonna try to avoid that, in the future. [ smirk ]

[promptly] You've identified your own problem. Never challenge the universe.

Yeeeeeah, not my brightest move. But hey, I lived to regret it. Not everybody's that lucky. [ sly ]

So, when can you start? [ that's a vaguely job-interview-conclude-y question, right? probably should also get your name at some point. ]

(no subject)

everwalking - 2013-06-15 02:21 (UTC) - Expand

cleanedslate - 2013-06-15 04:43 (UTC) - Expand

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everwalking - 2013-06-16 03:12 (UTC) - Expand

sdfjsk that face

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everwalking - 2013-06-16 21:32 (UTC) - Expand

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